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The Art in My Dating Past

In Relationships on September 16, 2010 at 8:00 am
written by Swag
 
Who we are, as lovers, is partially dependent upon how we interpret our dating history. Even if someone has hurt us, it’s a detriment to repress our memory of that person. We don’t need to continue communicating with them in order to appreciate what they have done for us (or to us). Our previous partners give us the ability to design better relationship templates, to become Michelangelo and create more inspiring works of art between ourselves and our future loved ones. We are the masters of our love lives, sailing our hearts through seas of tumultuous passion.
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I am very much aware of how my past girlfriends have affected my current dating choices. In high school, how healthy, aware or communicative a girl could be didn’t matter in the least. Every experience was so new that I just went with the flow. Kiss first and ask questions later. It was so easy to be care free, mainly because I didn’t have the experience needed to make wiser decisions. Wisdom always came later.

I have had three serious relationships (not including my current one) and I have dated a number of women. In my mind, each one was like a detail, chiseled into my ideal. I was a sculptor, refining my masterpiece. Combined, they became my muse, inspiring my greatest achievement. My Sistine Chapel was in its earliest stages, not yet as glorious as my heart intended because my mind had yet to conceive its completion.

Each person I dated was a tool on my workbench. Each girl or woman had a purpose. Changing this color. Modifying that image. Eliminating that idea. Nothing was permanent as I invested myself and my emotions into each relationship with varying degrees.

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– One of my first crushes was a track star…I loved those legs, those abs, that physique…check, put athleticism on the list and yes a dancer will do.

– I’ve always dated women who aren’t afraid to be themselves in front of new people. They are the center of attention, not because they needed the attention but because that’s just who they were…extrovert it is then.

– I’ll never again date a girl who tells me everything in order to talk about nothing. I need to know how to love my lady so she must be secure enough with herself to let me in….Self-esteem and security sound like good ingredients

– They say cancer is a water sign, well I like my water still and calm under the night sky. I can’t do the emotional pendulum, swinging from one extreme to the next. We need to be able to argue like adults….Level headedness and effective communication will do.

I believe in the past as an indicator of the future. It’s well written within the halls of yesteryear what I am and am not compatible with. I try to hold dear the idea of my partner as an improvement on the past because if she isn’t, then I probably haven’t learned my lesson yet. Love is an art form not blessed upon the masses. It is given only to those who work at their craft and hone their skills. I hope my dating past helps me compose a sonnet of love that sings for a lifetime.

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